Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Closure


Random Frieze with Dahlias
10 x 26
Pastel on Canson Mi-Tientes Paper

A dear friend of mine (who was recently widowed) passed away over a month ago following open heart surgery. I went over to visit and bring her some groceries. When I arrived at her house I found her in her favorite lounge chair having passed away. My griefing process has been a difficult one. I shall miss her forever as we were close good friends who confided in each other a lot. Last Saturday a close knit group of friends of hers had a get together to celebrate her in a way she would have liked,  having dinner and enjoying each other's company. We dressed up in her honor as she loved to dress up. It was a beautiful evening. I felt much love and belonging being with these wonderful ladies who are also dear friends. I believe our friend who passed was there in spirit and that she too loved this time we spend together that evening. After getting home and through the days that followed, I felt a big lifting of my grieving and a sense of joy and peace for the first time since her passing. Needless to say, a lot of things went to the wayside during my time of grieving including any urge to create. I believe I needed  to be still and allow myself to grieve which I did. A couple of days after our get together, I wanted to paint again. I started a new painting but found myself being drawn to a work that had been sitting around since last winter. An incredible desire to finish it came over me. I finished it and realized that I put closure to it, and that  was because I had put closure to this phase of my grieving process. I am at peace.

2 comments:

  1. Greetings dear Anita,

    Please except my condolences upon the loss of your dear and close friend.

    The grieving process differs for each one of us, for there is no magical formula that one can apply. We must come to terms in a way that brings closure and peace and as we are both artists, we have a tool that can assists us in the process of grieving.

    Having had open heart by-pass surgery a five years ago, I have gone through sever depression, making this the first year in which I can say depression has faded. Still, I have been unable to deal with the surgery that literally saved my life, including the complications that occurred eighteen months later.

    Though these events are different, depression and surviving involves a form of grieving, as one feels having cheated death, especially after learning I had only been hours from actually being declared dead.

    Please forgive the ramblings, as I feel I have lost the thread, the point I wished to make. What I am trying to express is that art is the tool and the process that has allowed me to grieve and come to terms what has happened.

    Warmest regards,
    Egmont

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  2. Thank you Egmont. When I am paintingI am getting back into a positive life action that is beneficial to my healing process as well.

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